A few weeks ago Jo's hubby asked me to help him plan a surprise birthday
party for her. We put our heads together and came up with a guest list, he
booked a huge Hummer limo so anyone that wanted to drink could, and didn't have
to drive (can you tell he owns a bar?) and I picked the activities.
I had everyone meet at D's house so we could hop in the limo and pick up
Jo together. I also had to meet Jo's very generous husband Adam there cause he
wanted to give me an envelope full of hundreds to cover our expenses for the
night. Yeah, he rules.
I also went to San Antonio (Johanna's hometown) the week before and
bought a carton of cascarones. Cascarones are confetti filled eggs you smash on
someone's head at a birthday party. I knew Jo would take an hour to perfectly
straighten her hair just for us to smother her in confetti. So I really needed
her to enjoy the night so she wouldn't murder me over the cascarones.
She looked really surprised at the sight of all of us, and the limo (she thought
it was just she and I going out for the extremely rare kid free dinner) and
then she looked really mad about the confetti when a moment later we all hit
her with them. Ha! But she quickly went back into her state of shock and
climbed into the limo.
First we headed to dinner. I wanted to go to Gloria's on
Greenville cause the birthday girl loves it but we ended up leaving at least 45
minutes later than we had planned. I got lost on the way to the meeting spot.
Twice. In traffic. On a Friday night. Surprised? I wasn't. Story of my
life.
So since the bar we were going to after dinner is in Fort Worth
Rene suggested a restaurant called Tillman's. She said she knew for sure they
had a dish called the Tree Hugger (Johanna is a vegetarian) so we told the limo
driver to head that way. And oh my word. It was soooo yummy! Def some place I'm
anxious to visit again. My tummy hurt a little bit after dinner because it's no
longer used to fattening food. I had skillet meat loaf, which was half pulled
pork. Yum, but fatty. It had fried green onions on top and macaroni n cheese
with bacon. Yeah, taste buds were in heaven, my tummy, not so much. So I showed
it who is in charge with tableside smores. So good.

After
dinner we headed over to Capital Bar's roof top patio called The Backyard.
Which reminds me of a funny story. When I was at Stephen F Austin a band from
Fort Worth that I liked, Alligator Dave, was supposed to be playing somewhere
off campus. I used to see them at The Aardvark in high school. So I asked
around and found out they were playing at a bar called The Back Porch.
Apparently it was a smaller bar attached to the back of a larger bar that faced the street. I wasn't familiar
with it cause we always went to Sports Shack.
So to find
out where it was I stopped by the computer lab in the library after doing some
research and googled the bar. Only instead of typing in 'The Back Porch' I
typed in 'the backdoor' and up popped a man's bare ass! Then it started
flashing all these hairless men in royal blue man panties shaking their hineys
in a line with their arms around each other's waists! Then all these pop ups
started. I couldn't make the pop ups stop in this filled to the brim computer
lab so I just grabbed my bag and ran. Ugh. Humiliation.
A few weeks
later I saw the Toadies in the larger bar in front of the bar I was looking for
and discovered my mistake and why that website popped up when I typed in 'the
backdoor' instead of 'The Back Porch.' Oops.
Anyway- I picked Capital Bar's roof top patio cause, duh, roof
tops rule. And because there was an awesome 80's tribute band playing that
night that I thought Jo would love. And I don't mean obnoxious old women
singing Walk Like an Egyptian or We Got The Beat in neon leg warmers, cause
that would make me throw a chair off the roof. But an 80's hair band! Yes! Sing in your head 'Panama', some Guns n Roses tunes, everybody's fav, The
Outfield's 'Lose Your Love' and mine and Barker's fav song by Rick Springfield 'Jessie's Girl.' (If you know the story of how we were introduced then you'll understand our fondness for the song.) Oh my gosh it was so fun!
Jo and Nicole danced up a sweat. D was quite the photographer. And
Brooklyn, Rene and I laughed till our faces hurt. Ashley even showed up later
since she lives not far from there. She didn't arrive until after 1am and the
line was down the block to get it. So Johanna made me con a doorman to
get her in the back door. Not my finest hour. I was so afraid he was going
to give me the lecture the bouncer gives in the movie 'Knocked Up' where he says
"You can't come in. You old. She's pregnant. I can't be lettin' a bunch of
old, pregnant bitches run around." I felt if Johanna said 'It's my
birthday and one of the members of our party is late. Can she come in this
way?" he might let her in. Because Johanna always gets what she wants. But
she disagreed with my plan of attack and instead pushed me at him and said,
"You're brown and skinny. Go get her." So you can imagine my relief
when I didn't get the "You old" speech and he let us go get Ashley
out of the never-ending line.
The limo got us home safely (I crawled in bed at 3am) and I was
still laughing 3 hours later when Hudson woke up for the day. It was the most
fun I'd had in a long time. Man I wish Johanna had birthdays more often.